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Are Your High School Friends Really Forever?

Jami Citko and Noor Raza

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High school friends help us get through these four years of struggle. They’re there for us when we need a new photo for our Instagram feed and when we have our first kiss. They’re our lunch buddies, our prom dates, and our support system when we have to do awful things like the Pacer test in gym class. But, even after all of these cherished memories, are we really going to stay in touch with them after high school?

No matter who your close friends are in high school, after graduation everyone tends to drift apart—everyone splits up for college, some move far away, and some watch others move away while they stay living comfortably in their hometown. Everyone’s lives take different paths, so naturally people drift apart from each other.

Colette Wheeler, a science teacher at Catonsville High school, experienced this after high school as her friends went their separate ways to fulfill their own lives.

“They live all over the world now…some are married, some aren’t, some have several children some don’t have kids…just very different perspectives,” Wheeler described.

As described in Julie Beck’s article in The Atlantic, “as life accelerates, people’s priorities and responsibilities shift, and friendships are affected, for better, or often, sadly, for worse.”

English teacher Carolyn Ruppel had a similar experience, but for slightly different reasons.

“It was harder to stay in touch because there was no internet…you would have to write letters or make phone calls and phone calls were really expensive, so it was hard to stay in touch,” Ruppel explained.

According to CHS sophomore Sadie Marks, communication is key to maintaining those close friendships, and if you really want to keep the friendship alive then you will.

“If you get in touch with them after a while you can still become best friends all over again…you just have to text them,” Marks explained. “There will be some times when you don’t talk, but it’s easy enough to just press call. If you really want it to work then you’ll work it out.”

Irene S. Levine, writer for Psychology Today, suggests that friendships are sometimes troublesome because the connection you have with friends fades when you don’t talk as often as you used to.

“When you talk less on the phone or get together, it’s hard to find common ground,” Levine explained. There’s simply less to be said. You begin feeling that she’s on some other wavelength.”

Despite the difficulties, some friends are still inseparable, like math teacher Matthew Fannon and his best friend Doug.

“We grew up one house apart all throughout high school and then for college we went our separate ways,” said Fannon. “Now he lives in D.C. and I live in Baltimore.”

Bottom line, it all depends on the circumstances. Friends who end up living near each other have a much higher chance of staying in touch, while long-distance friendships tend not to work out for most people.

Overall, though, friendships do become more difficult. It becomes harder and harder to make time for your friends when work, adult relationships, college, or whatever else your goals are in life, and that closeness between friends in high school hardly ever stays intact as other people enter your life and everyone must adjust to their new lives as adults.

“In high school your friends are really important, and you can’t imagine not being friends with them,” Ruppel explained, “but even though you care about them you move on to other people.”

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The Student News Site of Catonsville High School.
Are Your High School Friends Really Forever?